ANNOUNCING NEW FEATURES ~ FATHER'S LOVE LETTER TO YOU

San Antonio, Texas •
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    My Testimony

    My Testimony


    When God drew me to be saved, He used an intense hunger for the truth. I began seeking where I might find truth. To me, I did not care where I found it but it had to be available to everyone, it had to be fair and it could not be the product of just man. I started by studying the various philosophers. At that time, I so very longed that I could meet someone who understood life. We learn a great deal in school about how to DO certain things in life, certain jobs or functions but not about life itself. It is because of this I began to read the great philosophers of history.
    After some time doing this, I came to the conclusion that all these great philosophers based their philosophy on their surroundings and what influenced them. It is because of this that I dismissed philosophy because it was limited to one's own experiences and perceptions. As I was wondering where to search next, I met with a co-worker in a local lounge just to talk. The lounge was dark as the entertainment had already finished for the night. I did not drink but ordered a glass of wine to satisfy the cover charge. We sat in a dark corner and talked about nothing in general until I started talking about my search for the truth. She listened attentively but offered no suggestions of her own.
    Suddenly, the room became completely dark, no light at all. Just as I was wondering about this, I saw a pinpoint of light in the distance. It grew larger as if it were moving toward me. Suddenly, without any explanation, I "knew" this light was God and just as soon as I knew it was God, I knew that Jesus Christ, was His Son! By this time, my co-worker was greatly disturbed and left me there. I too left that lounge and went to bed that night wondering what I saw and wanting it at the same time.
    I was working in a hotel and when I went to work the next evening and spoke with the bellman who liked to introduce himself as, "I'm Fred and I'm a backslidden Baptist!" Funny, I know. I told him what happened the evening before and asked him how I can get this what I saw. He pointed across the lobby to the rental car desk and told me that the woman working there used to be a missionary to Mexico. Go ask her, he said. I walked over, introduced myself and told this woman what I had experienced the evening before. She dialed a number on the telephone and once she got who she was calling, handed the phone to me and told me to tell this person what I just told her. I did and the man on the other end led me in a prayer to accept Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. So, in the lobby of the busiest hotel in Houston, Texas, I gave my life to the Lord.
    About a month later, I had already joined a local Baptist church and there was a single's retreat they were hosting. I joined and went. I felt very strongly that God had something there for me and did not want to miss my opportunity. I was so very hungry for more of God. At this church, they had what they called fellowship dinners but there was no fellowship after God in those at all. Everyone talked about everything else and I wanted to talk about what Jesus did for me and hear the same from others. I went to bible studies where the leaders were obviously unprepared and tried just to get by with what little they knew. Still hungry and still thirsty.
    One evening at that retreat we all got to hear the amazing testimony of one of God's soldiers of the faith used in what became known as the Shantung Revival. This man of God was well into his 70s when he shared with us. His name is Charles Culpepper. He had a riveting testimony of how God broke him just before He released His Spirit on that land before the communist take over. Millions of Chinese came to faith through this revival and this man was the key that God used to initiate this great event.
    After listening to his testimony, I wanted the same breaking to happen to me that God did with him. That evening as I left the meeting hall, I went out into a secluded place and cried before the Lord with this desire on my lips and heart. The following day was to be a movie day. We all gathered together to watch a movie called "The Gospel Road" narrated by Johnny Cash which included songs by him and his wife, June Carter Cash. In this film, all I could see was how everything Jesus did was SELFLESS and everything I did was SELFISH in contrast. By the end of the movie, I was ready to fall on my face, being overcome by the knowledge of my own sin.
    The leader of this gathering offered that if anyone wanted to kneel, it would be okay. That was all I needed and I fell to the floor on my face and wept my heart out. As I was in that prone position, I saw that my whole life was lived in selfish pursuits. Even when I loved it was in order to be loved in return. I felt completely undone and knew I was worthy of all condemnation and that the judgment against me and my sin was just.
    Then, as I lay on my face in tears, I saw Jesus standing not far away with His arms extended to me as if He were offering me mercy. I cried all the more as I felt so unworthy of Him. In my eyes, I saw myself striking Him in mockery. I yanked His beard. I laid the stripes on His body. I nailed Him to that tree. I pierced His side. It was MY kind of love, that love born out of selfishness, that put Him, an innocent man, to death! Yet, here He was, offering ME mercy. As undeserving as I felt, I knew also that Jesus was my only hope of not perishing by my own sins. I called out to Him asking for mercy and forgiveness and as soon as I did, the most amazing peace permeated my being! I KNEW that at that moment, I was born again!
    What I was hoping for at the beginning of this retreat, came into being. I felt closer to God than I ever felt before in my life! But this was only the beginning as yet another experience was waiting for me later. I spent a great deal of my spare time pouring over the bible. I did not understand all I read at the time but I read anyway, in the hope that one day, it will all make sense to me. I read the gospels, the book of Acts, the letters from the Apostles, jumped to the book of Proverbs, then I began reading the Old Testament.
    One day, while at work, I encountered a situation with a hotel guest that did not go well. This man came into the hotel very belligerently. He was loud, rude and demanding. I was working the front desk at the time and tried to appease him but there was to be no appeasement at all. He wanted his way regardless of what the general rules allowed. Eventually he was checked in and I thought that was the end of it. Later that evening, this man had gone into the lounge and got drunk. He was so drunk that he could barely stand. He came out of the lounge to the front desk demanding someone show him where we parked his car. We had no valet service which means he had parked his own car but it is obvious that this man was past reasoning. I led him outside to the parking garage in the hopes he would suddenly remember but instead, he grabbed at me in a violent fashion. I was able to avoid his grasp and shoved him out the door. I came in and called our off-duty police officer to help. Moments later, this drunk man came back into the lobby and suddenly reached across the front desk counter at me and tore my clip-on tie from my neck. This is when the police officer arrested him for public drunkenness and assault.
    It was after this incident that a verse of scripture I had read came back to mind. It spoke of how when we were still sinners, yet God loved us and sent His Son to die for our sins. This really struck me as what I felt in my heart towards this drunk man was anything BUT love. A few other verses about God's amazing love came to memory including how Jesus spoke from the cross and said, "Forgive them Father for they know not what they are doing." I was struck to my heart as I saw none of this kind of love in me. I literally went into the closet behind the front desk and cried out to God.
    This was just the start of another thing that God wanted to do in my life. Everyday since, my mind and my heart began to see how shallow and empty the love in my own heart was and how far short it came to His love. Everyday, for the next week or two, my day started with this gnawing hunger and thirst for His love instead of my own. I ate when I could, went to work and returned home with this gnawing in my heart still eating away at me. There was to be no rest, no relief from this painful hunger and need I saw in me. I cried out every waking moment, even at times while at work. I became desperate, overwhelmed and obsessed with seeking God to have what can only come from Him. I saw my own love as filthy rags and begged Him to remove my love and give to me His perfect love.
    One day, after work and facing a few days off for the weekend, I was so tired from this crying out, I sat on my easy chair, used my bed as an ottoman and fell asleep while praying. Moments later I had fallen asleep and even in my dreams, I saw myself in a prone position before the throne of God, crying the same words, "I don't want my love anymore. If I could throw my love away like filthy rags, I would. If YOU could touch me, even with the tip of Your little finger, I know that is all that I will need!"
    Suddenly, I KNEW He was going to touch me! Just as soon as I knew He would touch me, He TOUCHED ME! It was like pure white liquid love pouring into every fiber of my being. I was no longer asleep as sometime during this 'dream', I had awakened and became fully aware of my surroundings, yet this flow of God was still coming in! Now it seemed that wave after wave of this pure white liquid love was pouring in and through me. Wave after wave until I finally cried out, "Enough!". I thought I would perish. It was more than I had room enough to contain! Just as suddenly as it came, it ceased and I fell back into my bed, exhausted saying over and over, "Thank You, thank You, thank You" until I fell asleep. After waking up from a very restful sleep, I woke up the next day and felt that I was floating on a cloud. The love of God was fully shed abroad in my heart. I could not stay in this room as it was simply not big enough to contain all He did.
    I lived in downtown Houston, Texas at this time and went for a walk downtown. As I did this, people were still walking to their respective offices to go to work. Everyone I laid eyes on, it seemed that I knew them all their lives although they were all strangers to me. I loved them all! God's love pouring through me was so great that I wanted to wrap my arms around the entire city and hug! For several days after this experience, it was like the first day. I spoke to no one and had not yet spoken in tongues. I did not know of the such yet. All I knew was that the love I lacked before was now in me in great abundance and I could not wait to pass it on! A few months later, a brother in Christ that I had come to know and befriend, asked me if I had received the Promise since I believed. I had no idea what he was referring to. I was still a babe in Christ and did not know yet what he was talking about.
    After his explanations and showing me in the bible, I told him of my recent experience and he confirmed that I was indeed baptized in God's Spirit. He laid hands on me to receive the gift of tongues but nothing happened. It would be later that this manifestation of this gift would come. I was in church and had such a grateful heart that I wanted to find an expression beyond what I knew to give praise to Him and out came the most beautiful language from my mouth that I had ever heard. This was my FIRST experience with tongues! I haven't stopped since! Many times since that first experience, I would speak in tongues and I could see what I was saying. I later learned that this was interpretation of tongues. Not many practiced this but only on several occasions. Some of them who gave interpretations, I knew instantly that they were wrong because I heard the interpretation but was afraid to speak out, not having done this before and unsure of how to proceed or whether it would be accepted.
    All that changed over time and since those extraordinary times in my life, He has given me many visions, dreams and revelations. When I wanted to go to bible college or to seminary to prepare for ministry, as this was my heart's desire, Holy Spirit would tell me not to as He wanted to teach me and He told me that no one would teach me what He was to teach. Thus began my walk as a prophet. Now, many years later, I still hear Him, hear His heart and walk as a prophet. It has been the most difficult walk imaginable and also the most rewarding! The cost has been very high but as He promised, the rewards far exceed any cost we may have to pay, both in this life and the world to come!
    There are many books that can be written, I am certain, in each of our lives of the mercy and goodness of the Lord towards us and I am looking forward to that time He promised that in the ages to come, He will reveal to us the kindness and goodness of His grace towards us. To think, in the ages to come! We have to be in our immortal bodies for this to happen and although we will be with Him, it will still take ages for all His goodness towards us to be revealed! What a wonderful promise! And even more than that, what a wonderful loving Father to allow us into His presence after we were all so undeserving and worthy of all condemnation! To me, HE is my great reward and I care for nothing or no one else above Him! To God and His Son Jesus Christ, be all honor and power and glory forever and ever....AMEN!

    Jerry Sundberg

    Soon after I received the Lord in 1976, I started receiving prophetic visions and warnings about the future of the church and the United States. I share my visions on my Hidden Manna websites and offer free of charge my two ebooks entitled “Hidden Manna” and “Hidden Manna 2”.

    Website: Hidden Manna

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    Item Reviewed: My Testimony Rating: 5 Reviewed By: Jerry Sundberg
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